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21 July 2005

without a destination, walking


i wonder if the changing of the guard in stockholm was so impressive a few hundred years ago. 'well, sven, it's noon and i'm here to replace you.' 'okay, jan, have a good shift.' nowadays, the changing of the guard draws a giant swarm of tourists and is conducted with much grandeur and ceremony. hell, an entire band shows up on horseback to parade around. how would you like to be one of these two horses with drums mounted on either side of its neck? wow. these two horses and their riders enjoyed the spotlight for about five minutes; the drummers went off on a drum solo while the horses walked robotically around in some well rehearsed circular pattern. the entire ceremony went off smoothly despite the potential for a horse to freak out and crush an unsuspecting tourista. [damn]. with all of the distraction, i missed the actual changing of the guard; i know that the guard was changed only because his uniform was a different color and i thought the current guard would have thought it inappropriate to change clothes in front of all the people.

i walked on; past a giant submerged in the water. past the national museum of cultural history with a sign indicating admission was free; in. an exhibit of toys and one of my favorite games. the best; a series of old photographs. i've decided that once i buy a house, i'll do my best to decorate the walls with old photographs of the surrounding area. back outside. my attention, as has been the case recently, is still drifting. i walked on without a destination, walking slowly, without purpose, mostly looking down [in stockholm, sweden; looking _down_ [although i suppose i wouldn't have seen the expended cap gun ammunition if i hadn't been looking down; great find]]. i bought more groceries before heading back to the crypt, and the act of paying for the groceries triggered a series of thoughts which hadn't been with me since i made the decision to travel. i wondered if my money would be better spent elsewhere... if it would be better saved for some type of investment, or capital for a new project, or a down payment on a house. i didn't know how to process these thoughts. after three and a half months on the road, i was tired of traveling.

back at the hostel, i made some food and then thought about the future of the global reconnaissance organization. would these feelings go away? did i need a break? did i need to return to the states for a while? it definitely didn't make sense to continue traveling if i wasn't excited about it; that would certainly be a complete waste of money. i had some time to make a decision; i'd be meeting sarah in prague in five days and we'd be traveling together for just under two weeks.

posted by paul on Thu 21 Jul 2005 at 00:00:00 est (-05:00)


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