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12 May 2006

the tingling sensations sparkling through


for those of you outside the circle, step inside.

my brother, brad, one of his friends, jason, and i went to see ministry this past friday at the ogden theater in denver. i typically hang back at the beginning of a show until the music kicks me and i become someone else. a someone else without control. controlled.

brad and i were standing on the second tier. during the first set change i'd heard the two couples shackled to the railing in front of us talking about past shows they'd seen. and it was the typical trying to one up the other i know more than you boring blather that screams something to me.

when ministry came out, the couple to the right did not represent the blather. after only a few songs they were already executing the push off from the railing maneuver in an attempt to fend off the onslaught. they were systematically being extracted from their comfort zone. but this couple wasn't tiny and for that reason they managed to dissuade many potential attackers from assaulting their position. and if they'd been to all the shows about which they'd boasted they would have known this was coming. they would have expected movement. the attack from behind. everyone wants the railing. had they been controlled i doubt they'd have cared.

i was myself until ministry kicked into just one fix and in an instant i was the someone else along with many others. the gigantic couple were overwhelmed and pushed back so fiercely that they lost grip of the railing. the someone else stepped up to the railing and began rocking harder than hard with both fists punishing the air. the girl returned incensed and slammed me back again. and i didn't care because my eyes were glazed over and i was consumed by the music. and the railing belongs only to those who fight hardest for it and she'd apparently carved her name in the steel and claimed it as her own, defending it not because she wanted to have the best view of the band but simply because it was hers. but it didn't matter. the attack continued and the couple lost control. not in the way i lost control and was devoured by the music. they lost control in the way that they were no longer listening to the music because they were being devoured by those around them. in that case the appropriate move is to surrender and move to the back of the theater where there is open space and no assault. but instead the girl began flailing wildly. and the someone else who is never afraid leaned over to both of them and screamed 'what the FUCK are you doing? what the fuck did you EXPECT [you stupid fucks who have been to ALL these SHOWS]? this is a MINISTRY show... not a backstreet boys show.' girlie didn't like that and began directing her fists at me. and many hit me but i was someone else and didn't feel them. and it's strange i thought nothing could snap me out of the haze but her last blow... a closed fist wind up wall to my face... quickly brought me back to reality.

i stumbled back without a shred of anger. i was far more interested in the sensation and analyzed the situation with complete clarity. tasting the blood. that fucking girl had just punched me.

fucker. if i'd been punched ten times as hard by someone entranced by the music i'd have smiled and been happy. injuries resulting from music-induced trances are completely acceptable (and expected in the front rows). injuries resulting from malice are not. fucker. after i'd finished analyzing the tingling sensations sparkling through my face i left the second tier and alerted a security guard. the guard led us both outside the venue and told us to tell our stories to a police officer standing nearby. she said she'd punched me because i'd pulled her hair and had insulted her. PULLED HER HAIR? INSULTED HER? i must have really pushed a button when i'd mentioned the backstreet boys. i finally asked her for an apology; she complied; we went back in. fuck her.

despite the wall to the face incident, i had a kickass time. there's never a bad time when i become someone else.

posted by paul on Fri 12 May 2006 at 00:00:00 est (-05:00)


it's funny that this should happen to you considering it is an almost verbatim account of the situation that landed me on the sidewalk at a funker vogt show several years ago. of course, in my case there were no punches thrown and no re-entry. i'm not sad that manray is closed, i only wish it had burned to the fucking ground.

posted by calvitron on Tue 16 May 2006 at 12:34:56 est (-05:00)

3 things:
1) holy shit
2) i'm so proud
3) picture of the damage

posted by k on Tue 16 May 2006 at 14:42:26 est (-05:00)

calvitron: ha! i remember that night. sucka!

posted by paul recon on Wed 17 May 2006 at 01:27:42 est (-05:00)

k: 1. no shit, eh? 2. thanks. 3. none exists which shows the full extent of the damage. such a shot would have had to have been taken intra-nasally to show the massive amounts of clotted blood. you'll have to settle for what i saw at the moment of impact. check it: http://www.globalrecon.org/images/globalrecon_2006051202.jpg

posted by paul recon on Wed 17 May 2006 at 01:43:22 est (-05:00)

I worked security at Avalon for a few shows, including Ministry. I was expecting a near "Thunderdome" frenzy but was instead assaulted by the level of politeness that one might extend when opening a door for a woman that very much reminds you of your grandmother. The crowd was. . .nice? What the hell?

The Morrissey show, on the other hand, for all of it's youthful Vegans and "don't hurt the baby seals" mentality was an all-out kumite without the Jean-Claude Van Damme high kicks. Those kids were climbing over each other to get on stage.

posted by redpath on Thu 18 May 2006 at 03:57:36 est (-05:00)

redpath: when i went back inside after the 'incident', i went right down to the front and rocked out with the crowd there. everyone there was awesome... rocking hard, but _smiling_ and having fun... helping people up, that sort of thing. occasionally at shows you'll run into a guy or two who isn't paying any attention to the band and is only there to 'kick some ass', but at this show everyone was great... everyone with the exception of gigantor girl.

i had to look up the word 'kumite'. now it's my favorite word.

posted by paul recon on Fri 19 May 2006 at 00:38:31 est (-05:00)

I wanted to embed a jpeg of a "Bloodsport" poster so you might have a reference for "kumite". Nothing like a little Jean Claude Van Damme to brighten your day.

posted by redpath on Sun 21 May 2006 at 03:12:07 est (-05:00)

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