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10 October 2007

as sickeningly excited about it as i

for the past three nights i've been sleeping on the second floor of a hotel in san antonio in texas, one of the great united states of america, perhaps the greatest, here stationed until friday afternoon in order to attend a training session at my new company about which i am sickeningly excited. i think i've not yet met one employee at this company who isn't just as sickeningly excited about it as i. i am no longer nervous.

i attempt the close door button each time i step through the elevator door in the aforementioned hotel. while i haven't employed the scientific method in my experiments, i've concluded that on the two elevators in this hotel the close door button does absolutely nothing.

cecil adams at straightdope.com reports here that he called the otis elevator company in farrington in connecticut, one of these great united states of america, and was told that the button does indeed work. in the same article he goes on to summarize, after having consulted with "various elevator repairmen", four reasons why the close door button might not appear to work: 1. the button is set on a time delay; 2. the button is broken; 3. the button has been disconnected; or 4. the button was never connected in the first place.

during my research, i also came across this article which states that some elevators have an express mode. by pressing your floor button and the close door button simultaneously, you can direct the elevator to express directly to your floor regardless of other passengers' floor selections.

i await the delivery of gaskets and o-rings so that i may reassemble the front bevel gearcase and clean the carburetors of for great justice. does texas permit lane splitting?

posted by paul on Wed 10 Oct 2007 at 23:42:27 est (-05:00)

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