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03 November 2007

i appreciate these phenomena

: the traffic light turns from red to green but the driver of the lead vehicle isn't paying attention. seconds pass as the drivers behind him wait patiently. the lead driver eventually looks up and sees the green light. rather than accelerate at a normal rate, he accelerates at twice the normal rate, leaving those behind him to contemplate the shattered state of their secondary and insignificant lives. i appreciate this phenomenon.

: everything and everyone associated with ramming bumpers including but not limited to vehicles equipped with ramming bumpers, owners of vehicles equipped with ramming bumpers, and those who install ramming bumpers. http://bumpers-4you.com declares, via copy and paste to globalrecon.org:

Bumpers enhance and protect your truck. Our featured truck and SUV bumpers have the following excellent features:

» Adds a touch of attitude style to your front end
» Versatility to hold auxiliary lighting or a winch
» Stop low-speed impacts from causing thousands in damage
» Prevents stray shopping carts and careless drivers
» Various shapes and sizes designed around your vehicle

Keep in mind that bumpers are all the same. So, an intelligent decision is required for you to come up with the right buy! We can help you. Call us now!

unfortunately, they've missed the most important feature of the ramming bumper which is, of course, the ability to ram the shit out of other vehicles on the highway. texans are big on ramming bumpers and i appreciate this phenomenon.

: my presumption that most owners of pick-up trucks, especially those who have installed a tarp-like snappable cover on their pick-up truck bed, utilize the beds of their pick-up trucks for hauling anything which would not just as easily fit into a typical car trunk or back seat approximately one day out of each year. i appreciate this phenomenon.

posted by paul on Sat 03 Nov 2007 at 05:02:25 est (-05:00)

comments

ramming bumper aka brush guard

you know how all those texan suburbanites like to drive off through the sagebrush. come to think of it maybe we could call them fence guards to.

posted by jhunterak on Mon 05 Nov 2007 at 14:47:56 est (-05:00)

brush guard my ass. i'm talking about ramming bumpers, man. _ramming_ bumpers. two big ramming bars... smaller bars to protect the headlights in case the vehicle you've just rammed flies apart into little pieces... attached directly to the frame via some industrial strength mounting bolts. _ramming_ bumpers. the _only_ reason to install these things is so you can ram the shit out of other vehicles. i appreciate that.

posted by paul recon on Tue 06 Nov 2007 at 01:53:08 est (-05:00)

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