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27 June 2007

the taste or sophistication

brad and i shared an arrogant bastard ale last night. the label on the bottle reads:

"this is an aggressive beer. you probably won't like it. it is quite doubtful that you have the taste or sophistication to be able to appreciate an ale of this quality and depth. we would suggest that you stick to safer and more familiar territory -- maybe something with a multi-million dollar ad campaign aimed at convincing you it's made in a little brewery, or one that implies that their tasteless fizzy yellow beer will give you more sex appeal. perhaps you think multi-million dollar ad campaigns make a beer taste better. perhaps you're mouthing your words as you read this."

i wasn't ready for the arrogant bastard last night. next time i'll be ready.

posted by paul at Wed 27 Jun 2007 at 11:46:06 EST (-05:00) | comments (0)

26 June 2007

put yourself out there and execute

i'm out there.

i specialize in the obtuse. i excel at it.

posted by paul at Tue 26 Jun 2007 at 18:55:30 EST (-05:00) | comments (2)

25 June 2007

of ghost rock in utah

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for.great.justice is back online; ray fisher of attitude custom cycles in ely, nevada, is the destructor. while ray wasn't able to pinpoint the exact cause of the starting problem, he determined there are issues involving the carburators and the vacuum tube coming off of the fuel valve which will necessitate a thorough cleaning after i make it back to boston. disconnecting the vacuum tube allows me to start the bike and serves as a temporary fix. giant amounts of thanks to ray and attitude custom cycles for helping me out.

i'm currently in golden, colorado, hanging with my brother. i have survived the loneliest road in america.

the photo above was taken directly opposite of ghost rock in utah as the sun was setting over devil's canyon. massive. so massive.

posted by paul at Mon 25 Jun 2007 at 16:40:34 EST (-05:00) | comments (0)

12 May 2006

the tingling sensations sparkling through

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for those of you outside the circle, step inside.

my brother, brad, one of his friends, jason, and i went to see ministry this past friday at the ogden theater in denver. i typically hang back at the beginning of a show until the music kicks me and i become someone else. a someone else without control. controlled.

brad and i were standing on the second tier. during the first set change i'd heard the two couples shackled to the railing in front of us talking about past shows they'd seen. and it was the typical trying to one up the other i know more than you boring blather that screams something to me.

when ministry came out, the couple to the right did not represent the blather. after only a few songs they were already executing the push off from the railing maneuver in an attempt to fend off the onslaught. they were systematically being extracted from their comfort zone. but this couple wasn't tiny and for that reason they managed to dissuade many potential attackers from assaulting their position. and if they'd been to all the shows about which they'd boasted they would have known this was coming. they would have expected movement. the attack from behind. everyone wants the railing. had they been controlled i doubt they'd have cared.

i was myself until ministry kicked into just one fix and in an instant i was the someone else along with many others. the gigantic couple were overwhelmed and pushed back so fiercely that they lost grip of the railing. the someone else stepped up to the railing and began rocking harder than hard with both fists punishing the air. the girl returned incensed and slammed me back again. and i didn't care because my eyes were glazed over and i was consumed by the music. and the railing belongs only to those who fight hardest for it and she'd apparently carved her name in the steel and claimed it as her own, defending it not because she wanted to have the best view of the band but simply because it was hers. but it didn't matter. the attack continued and the couple lost control. not in the way i lost control and was devoured by the music. they lost control in the way that they were no longer listening to the music because they were being devoured by those around them. in that case the appropriate move is to surrender and move to the back of the theater where there is open space and no assault. but instead the girl began flailing wildly. and the someone else who is never afraid leaned over to both of them and screamed 'what the FUCK are you doing? what the fuck did you EXPECT [you stupid fucks who have been to ALL these SHOWS]? this is a MINISTRY show... not a backstreet boys show.' girlie didn't like that and began directing her fists at me. and many hit me but i was someone else and didn't feel them. and it's strange i thought nothing could snap me out of the haze but her last blow... a closed fist wind up wall to my face... quickly brought me back to reality.

i stumbled back without a shred of anger. i was far more interested in the sensation and analyzed the situation with complete clarity. tasting the blood. that fucking girl had just punched me.

fucker. if i'd been punched ten times as hard by someone entranced by the music i'd have smiled and been happy. injuries resulting from music-induced trances are completely acceptable (and expected in the front rows). injuries resulting from malice are not. fucker. after i'd finished analyzing the tingling sensations sparkling through my face i left the second tier and alerted a security guard. the guard led us both outside the venue and told us to tell our stories to a police officer standing nearby. she said she'd punched me because i'd pulled her hair and had insulted her. PULLED HER HAIR? INSULTED HER? i must have really pushed a button when i'd mentioned the backstreet boys. i finally asked her for an apology; she complied; we went back in. fuck her.

despite the wall to the face incident, i had a kickass time. there's never a bad time when i become someone else.

posted by paul at Fri 12 May 2006 at 00:00:00 EST (-05:00) | comments (7)

09 May 2006

a swirling silent white

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this is about a feeling. a feeling that is surging through me right now. some feelings are sounds. this one isn't. this one is white.

a swirling silent white rolling in waves from here in the space below my chest to my spine and up my spine to the top of my head where it's just waiting to make something explode. and that's the best way to describe it. if i were to concentrate on something right now i think i could make it explode. i could just unleash this white on something and explode it.

why am i feeling like this? because of things like this. and when the sun pours down but the wind makes everything just right. and should i take this road or that road. or both.

the past five days have been enormous. i mean... perfect. pure perfect. the weather. the wind. the sights and smells and touches. i had no idea it would be this way and now i wish i'd traveled around the world with my own transportion because it's an entirely different feeling of adventure. it's just so. so. so. [!!!]

i don't want to ruin this with details. so i won't. imagine.

posted by paul at Tue 09 May 2006 at 00:40:00 EST (-05:00) | comments (2)